Fabulous Spellos Brothers

Sometimes, The World is Just Strange

Hi Gang...

Storytime, folks.  This one's about music and, well, how the universe sometimes is just so connected. No videos, or cool tech tools to share...just a story about what happened this weekend (I'll try to keep it brief).

Went to see the Allman Brothers Band in NYC on Saturday night (great show, natch).  They were playing at the United Palace Theater in Washington Heights, where I was born.  The theater, which was the old Loews' Theater on 175th Street, is where my Mom took me and Peter to see A Hard Days' Night, when it was released in 1964.  It became a revival church for many years, and now it is the site of some rock 'n roll concerts.

Driving to the show, I was talking with my friend about the old neighborhood, how it changed, how we saw A Hard Days' Night there, etc.  You know, memory lane sort of stuff.  I wasn't that old when we moved (7), so my memories of my time there is spotty (how much of your life when you were 4 or 5 do you remember).  The Beatles' movie, however, was one crystal clear point in time.

So, as we're driving to the theater (with XM Radio on, of course), we turn the corner and I see the theater for the first time in years.  And, at that split second, comes the opening chord (G suspended... I am a musician after all) on the radio to A Hard Day's Night.

The chill went very, very deep down my spine.  Sometimes, the world is just strange.

Jim

Biz, The Arts & Hillary

Hi Gang...

Been a while since I've posted (brother Peter's been better at it recently), but this morning, I read two blogs (from blogger faves) that just are required reading (at least to me...which is why I'm sharing).   They weave in business, the arts, knowing when to quit and understanding your true fans.  Lengthier than the average blog (and perhaps smarter than the average bear), here they are:

- Seth Godin - A recent post talks about knowing when to quit...and applies it as well to the current presidential nomination campaign - Seth's blog.  

- Kevin Kelly - A truly wonderful and inspired blog about biz, the arts and understanding the new nature of biz - Kevin Kelly blog

Hope you enjoy reading them with your Sunday morning cup of Joe.

Jim

HOW THOSE RESOLUTIONS COMING ALONG?

So far in 2008, I’ve lost 357 lbs, just by eating better, exercising more AND more importantly buying all the stuff television tells me to buy. I’ve had my Bow flexed, my abs crunched, my thighs mastered, my hair replaced, my eyes lasered and take my little blue pill so I can take care of business. I eat like Valerie Betinelli and smell like Elizabeth Taylor. The only person that feels better than me is Chuck Norris, because he is, Chuck Norris.

Now, if you also realize my tongue has permanent residence in my cheek, you’ll know that I’m just overwhelmed by the media’s insistence, that now’s the time to fix that crappy life of ours. Why, you may ask, Mr. & Ms. Consumer, is now the time? Because we (you, not me) made your New Year’s Resolutions! Who ever came up with that concept, went to the head of their marketing class. It’s brilliant. Non-sectarian guilt and possible absolution. It’s like penance for atheists! Make a list, check it twice (works for Santa) then take care of all the mistakes, wrong doings, illegal, immoral or fattening things you did the year before, and bingo, in 30 days, you can look like Mrs.Don Shula?!?!?!! Sound familiar? Your favorite religion probably has a holiday for that same sort of shenanigans, they just give it a fancier name.

So, instead of making a list of resolutions and wasting a mess o’ money on stuff I won’t be using by the end of February, I’m going to spend my time focusing on helping others, like you, get through your day more easily. No, I’m not sending you your money-back product guarantees So, when you’re done working out with the CALFMASTER 3000 or trying a 30 day supply ASSAWAY diet pills (it’s an ancient Aztec totally organic and all-natural* formula), here’s a trio of fun websites, that just may help you laugh your way to stress relief and give you great recipes when you do indulge! Life's too short to just do what they tell us!

(*totally organic and all-natural means plan on being in the john for the better part of Thursday)

1 -Bake Space – a place of cookers and cakes
www.bakespace.com

They call themselves “the social-networking site for people passionate about food. I call it tasty-licious! Hey, c’mon, how many calories can there be a virtual chocolate cupcake?

2- Mad as Hell Club – a place to rant and rave
www.madashellclub.net

“We publish essays, art, cartoons, and photographs presenting ideas we feel deeply about, along with some possible solutions to the problems that confront us. 

3 - Mental Floss – a place to laugh and think and laugh some more
www.mentalfloss.com

“Where knowledge junkies get their fix”

 
Still stressed out. Go to www.tbs.com and click on a FAMILY GUY episode. Usually enough to make me laugh AND put down the Twinkie! And speaking of Twinkies….ah, we’ll save that for next month. Well, kats and kittens, have a great rest of the month, and remember, to all our friends in Tampa, Dallas
and Green Bay, “HOW ‘BOUT DEM BIG BLUE BOYS!!!! www.giants.com .

Wel, that's all she Kyle Rote. (ugh -go look it up)

love and puns,
P.Spellos
actor/author/lifelong GIANTS fan
1/21/08

RULE #2 - NICE IS NOT FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNY......PERIOD!

It's almost Halloween. BOO!!!!!! (click on photo for full picture)

DING DONG THE BITC...er WITCH IS DEAD

...but Toto is set for life. Look gang, another NO FRUIT CUP Award so soon! The late Leona Hemsley, who in death seems to be as mean, selfish and rightious as in so-called life, left a $12 million dollar trust fund for her dog, Trouble. HER DOG?!?!?!

 

Now, I'm a pet owner. And I love my cat more than some industry producers I know, but I wouldn't leave her a trust fund!!! Perhaps, I don't know, I'd set up a trust fund (in Athena's name, of course) at a major university for schorships in the arts and sciences. Here's another one, re-build the 9th Ward in New Orleans, or perhaps some money and food (and housing, Leona?)flood relief for the folks drenched in the Mid West. But, oh no, not the stupidly rich and personally vindictive. (now in case you think I'm bangin' on the idly rich, the current queen of decomposition once said, "only the little people pay taxes.")

 

Helmsley stated in her will. " I direct that when my dog, Trouble, dies, her remains shall be buried next to my remains in the Helmsley mausoleum." (Okay, a little creepy, not a waste of money, perhaps taking this "All Dogs Go To Heaven" thing a tad too seriously) The mausoleum, she ordered, must be "washed or steam-cleaned at least once a year." She left behind $3 million for the upkeep of her final resting place in Westchester County, where she is buried with her husband, Harry Helmsley. (another from the Schaffer Circle of Winners) Come kids, love you pets with all your heart, but don't leave any money to them! Want to help animals when you're dead and gone, there's hundreds of worthy animal rights and protection groups that could use the help.

 

$3 Million to steam clean the mausoleum. (read it again, I dare you) Now, think how long it took to pay off that student loan. Or that over-priced apartment you had to share just to live in the Big City when you left school. How about those men and women, sleeping in doorways, eating from the trash and now dying from the heat wave. Gee, they could use a place to live and eat. Ah, screw 'em. It least Trouble will smell like Mr. Clean throughout eternity.

 

So, with no further ado, I give you, the soon to be steam cleaned Leona Helmsley ,The Queen of Mean and Selfish, today's NO FRUIT CUP Award recipient. Hey, Leona, it could be worse. You could be one of your grandkids who got zippo in your will. 

Then again, at least you're not Michael Vick.

 

P. Spellos

actor/comedian/humanist

8/29/07

 

A MIND IS A TERRIBLE THING TO WASTE

Another difference between the two cities I've called home, Los Angeles and New York, and the rest of the world, circa Labor Day, 2007:

 

Did ya hear Alberto Gonzalez finally quit?

 

Rest of the world - "Oh yeah, well it's about time!"

 

LA - "Oh yeah, what show was he on?"

NY - "Oh yeah, who'd the Mets bring in to replace him?"

 

And for those schooled in South Carolina, the answer is, "the Iraq".

Happy Motoring -
Peter

BITING THE HAND THAT FEEDS US

The Inaugural NO FRUIT CUP Award **

        Welcome to the NO FRUIT CUP Award, given henceforth by yours truly. It will be awarded to those individuals, groups, corporations, cults and reality shows that personify exactly what you need to get by in this world: chicanery, mis-direction, theatrics, denial, canoles, greed and not playing nice with others. Nay, nay, in this world, you get points for authenticity and compassion, not hubris and entitlement. You bring something to the table, you get something. No play nice, no fruit cup! (dinner is served promptly at eight, Nurse Diesel fans) I hope to find and bring to light the ongoing escapades of these social jesters and financial miscreants in the field of business, entertainment, sports, food, everywhere!

        This week’s award goes to our friends at Embassy Suites, who in a recent commercial proclaimed they had a “Complimentary Made-to-Order Breakfast.” Really?!?!? Holy Emmenthaler, Batman! "Those other “crappy” hotels, they’ve been over charging us for years for made-to-order food. I coulda ordered it they way they make, and save lots of cash!!!” Come on, isn’t the whole concept of a restaurant is, “we will give you choices, then tell us how you like it!

        Look, I’m not the first scribe to wail about truth in advertising, but really, ES, this is the best R&D can come up with to get our business and vacation dollars, “we’ll cook the food they way you like it?!?! Please no whining about how they mean it’s not a buffet. If you want a review, go to Zagat’s! You’d get my attention if an advert said “Hey, We Like Making Breakfast. Are You Hungry?” Wow. Honest. Primal. I bet you then the next time you saw the words Embassy Suites you’ll think “they make a great breakfast”. You may even tell someone about it.

        We don’t mind being sold, but we don’t like being fooled. Telling us “made-to-order” is free is like saying “enjoy our free Napa Valley air with every California wine we open!” Don’t get me wrong. Please partake in breakfast while staying for business or pleasure at a lovely Embassy Suites. Just make sure it’s made to order! Check the bill if you’re not sure…

P.Spellos
8/28/07

 

** ed. note - The spirit of the NO FRUIT CUP AWARD is truth swaddled in the blanket of humor. It is by laughing at ourselves that we only can truly affect everlasting changes in behavior. I am by no means am attempting to attack anyone or group personally. Unless they’re really, really off the charts stupid or lying. Then, they’re meat

Crunch Time at the North Pole

CRUNCH TIME AT THE NORTH POLE

a short play

 

FADE IN : INTERIOR - Psychiatrist’s Office.

 

A warm yet modern room with two easy chairs. Seated in one is a woman, elegant, in the September of her years, business casual, legs crossed. Her credentials adorn the wall behind her. Seated in the other is a rather large, exhausted man. Long beard, rosy cheeks, he sits, slumped. There is a strange, pungent odor, perhaps emanating from under his shiny black boots. Both have the good taste not to say anything about it.

 

Doc

So, how are you doing, Kris?

Kris

How do I look, Doc? I’m fat, swollen and tired.

And we’re still over two weeks away!

Doc

Seems each year yo….

Kris

(grumbling continues) Damn, Internet! I can’t keep up with all the new toys and gadgets. And last weeks’ model isn’t good enough for these little bast….er, kids today! Faster, more power, multiple capabilities. I ain’t Sony. I’m working with elves, for reindeers’ sake! You ever see an elf on no sleep weld himself to a motherboard with a blazing hot sodering iron?!?! The screams alone will shake the snow off your shingles in an instant. Shattered Mrs. Claus’ unicorn collection. Now, my insurance is through the igloo!

 

Doc

It’s a different world now, Kris. You just ha…..

Kris

And those toy lists! Nobody brings them to Macy’s anymore. Oh no, they clog up my e-mail with over-sized attachments night and day, like a million pieces of  holiday spam, and not the good kind of spam, where your dip it in egg wash and deep fry it up in whale blubber….

Doc

(cringes, then) Kris, they’re only children….

Kris

Hey Doc, if it was just the kids, no problem. The world is a tougher place for all of us, much more than it’s ever been. Everybody’s in it for themselves. I think it still can change. More folks want to believe in something. Old paradigms are falling like a house of cards. I get it. I’m the perfect target. They don’t REALLY think I exist, but why not take a chance, write me a letter that you wanted to do 40 years ago……

Doc

Sounds like they need you.

Kris

Yeah, I know, it makes my bowl full of jelly jiggle even more, but…nobody ever asks me….about me!

 

Doc

Asks you what, Kris?

(a beat)

Kris

You know, (a little shy)….what, maybe what Santa wants for Christmas?

Doc

(a little dumfounded) Isn’t it just cookies and milk?

Kris

(laughs) Doc, look at me. Do I look like I need cookies and milk? I may be ageless and timeless, but the trans fat in those cookies is putting extra weight and pressure on my sleigh bells. Not to mention I’m borderline lactose intolerant.

Doc

Who knew?

Kris

Nobody asked.

Doc

Point taken. (a beat) So, can I ask you a question.

Kris

Sure.

Doc

What do you want for Christmas, Kris?

Kris

Nothing, really?

Doc

No, go on.

Kris

Nothing, honest,

Doc

Kris, you just said…

Kris

(excited like a kid) Got ya! What do I want?!?! Oh, I’m ready for that one. I’ve been making and re-making this list for years and years. And I just want three things. That’s it. Then I’ll get back to work. Well, in a few days. I still have to watch all the Dexter episodes I’ve Tivo’d…

Doc

So, what are those three things you’d ask from…your Santa?

Kris

I’m not in the best shape in the world. No, really. It’s damn near impossible eat right AND get excersise, now that we’ve gone year round at the North Pole to keep up with the demand for joy and toys. Seems many of my business world boys and girls feel the same. Well, my Santa should check out http://www.nustep.com/ . They have a Recumbent Cross Trainer, the TRS 4000, setting a new standard in exercise. You get a great cardio workout that is both easy on the knees and back. And mine’s killin’ me all the time. You know how heavy a frostbitten reindeer is?

Doc

More than I care to imagine…..I thought you didn’t like the Internet?

Kris

Gee, I can’t seem to recall your name on the “Nice” list?

Doc

Got it. Internet. Santa. One and the same.

Kris

At least for now.

Doc

What would gift # 2 be?

Kris

Another no-brainer, Doc. Once I’m in shape, it’s time to relax again. And that dusty old rocker is no place for my jolly old elf to nestle anymore.

(a beat)

Don’t go there, Doc!

Doc

Perhaps something in a recliner, then?

Kris

You bet your candied gum drops, Doc! And not just any recliner, for this fat boy! I want a 2007 La-Z-Boy Power Recliner with 10 motor, continuous or pulsating, massage with heat recliner styles. Woof. Try clicking

http://www.la-z-boy.com/ourfurniture/collections/power_recliners.aspx

and I feel calmer already.

Doc

Looking to lose yourself in a wave of tranquility?

Kris

Nah. Just catching up on sleep. Mrs Claus snores like a teamster after a donut binge.

Doc

Sorry to hear that. Now, what would be your third wish?

Kris

That’s a toughie. So many good choices. The hot sauce sampler at www.insanechicken.com , or www.champagnemagic.com to celebrate the New Year, even www.101cookbooks.com with a new frozen fish recipe…

Doc

Say, for a guy who complained about the Internet, you sure know plenty of Way Cool Websites! Where can I get such a culinary compendium of fabulous websites?

Kris

I thought you’d never ask, Doc. I got them all from the Spellos Brothers new book, 99 Fabulous FOOD Websites You Can’t Eat Without. Hey, if all the boys and girls help Santa out and go to http://www.lulu.com/content/443889 to buy the book, maybe he will have some more well-deserved time in his new recliner!

Doc

Great ideas, Kris. Well, look at the time. That’s your session for today?

Kris

And you didn’t mind the shameless plug for Jim and Peter’s book?

Doc

Why should I dear? Same time next week, Kris?

Kris

You bet, Mrs. Spellos. Say hi to your boys for me. And tell them I have something special for them this year.

Doc

I believe they already have already gotten something special, Kris.

They have each other. And, they still believe in you.

(a beat)

Merry Christmas, Santa!

Kris

Same to you, Mrs. S! And a Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

(a long beat)

Now, for reindeer’s sake, could you help me out of this chair?

 

(blackout)

fini

 

 

 

 

Greetings from the brothers

Greetings & welcome from Peter & Jim (this is Jim typing).  Our blog is up and running.  Daily (perhaps semi-daily) musings from both of us about things that interest us.  Food.  Technology.  Sports.   Perhaps music & theater.  Who knows what might be on our minds (clearly, we frequently don't).

We're also about to publish our first book, "99 Fabulous Food Websites You Can't Eat Without".  It'll be out later this fall.  More books to follow, but for now we're going to focus on the food & technology topics (but not always).  Never know what you might see/read...except we hope you enjoy it all.

We hope you enjoy reading it.  Let us know...we want to hear from you.

Bye for now.  I'm sure Peter will be typing his opening hello shortly. 

Jim